A daughter takes her old father in a wheelchair to a retirement home for the first time. The nurse, expecting their arrival, greets them with, “Welcome...
A respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, ‘I would like to buy some cyanide’...
A woman goes to the store to buy a parrot as a family pet. As she walks into the pet shop, she asks the owner, “How...
Thomas is 32 years old and he is still single. One day a friend asked, “Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will...
A husband in his backyard is trying to fly a kite. He throws the kite up in the air, the wind catches it for a few...
This little kid is walking up the street with his Daddy. They see two dogs going at it. The little kid says “Hey daddy what are...
An elderly couple were sitting outdoors at a cafe when they noticed an old man who seemed to be having trouble crossing the street with an...
A man is at work on the day of his marriage anniversary… However, on the same day, his incredibly hot secretary confesses her feelings and offers...
The young couple invited their aged pastor for Sunday dinner. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked their son what they...
An old farmer was farming and minding his own business. “There has been a wild Forest Man seen in the forest. He has little beady red...
Teacher: Kids, what does the chicken give you? Kids: Meat! Teacher: Very good! Now, what does the pig give you? Kids: Bacon! Teacher: Great! And what...
Grandpa and Little Johnny are sitting on a bench in the park. Johnny asked, “Grandpa, are you going to take that new pills?” Grandpa looks at...
A husband and wife get up on Sunday morning. After breakfast, the wife notices that her husband isn’t dressed for church. “Why aren’t you dressed for...
Little Johnny spends a rare weekend with his dad: “Son, this is your weekend, have anything you want. Ask and ye shall receive.” After a little...
Bob’s wife Sally called their insurance agent to file a claim and demand the amount the barn was insured for, $60,000. “Hold on just a second...
A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk. So the bartender says to another man...
A husband suspected his wife was cheating on him. He explained his situation to a pet shop owner who replied, “I have a parrot that will...
Two children, Johnny and Alex were sitting outside a clinic. Alex was crying very loudly. Johnny: Why are you crying? Alex: I came here for a...
The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees wasn’t in and had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one...
A woman went down to the Welfare Office to get aid. The office worker asked her, “How many children do you have?” “Ten,” she replied. “What...