I was waiting on the sofa

Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday.

My wife didn’t wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids.

I went to work and even my colleagues didn’t wish me a happy birthday.

As I entered my office, my secretary said, “Happy birthday, boss!” I felt so special.

She asked me out for lunch.

After lunch, she invited me to her apartment.

We went there and she said, “Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?”

“Okay,” I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling,

“SURPRISE!!!” while I was waiting on the sofa… n***ked.