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The teacher noticed that Johnny had been day dreaming for a long time. She decided to get his attention. “Johnny,” she said, “If the world is...
Two men are standing on a golf course. The first one steps up, tees his first ball, and positions himself for a swing. The man lifts...
A doctor told his patient after reviewing his x-rays he needed surgery costing $5000. The patient said he only had $500.00 and what could be done....
The doctor said, ‘Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very...
An elderly man and woman meet in a bar and get to talking. They are enjoying their conversation so much that, when the bar closes, they...
Two men arrive at the Pearly Gates at about the same time, both wanting to know if they will be admitted to heaven. St. Peter asks...
A nun gets into a cab and the cab driver won’t stop staring at her. She asks him why is he staring and he replies, ‘I...
A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a “handy-woman” and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to...
After receiving a beautiful haircut, a doctor asks the barber, “How much do I owe you?” “Oh, I never charge a doctor,” the barber replies. “You...
A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed. After years of this the wife wants him to quit, so she gets 2 shot...
A guy comes home completely drunk one night. He lurches through the door and is met by his scowling wife, who is most definitely not happy....
This woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off: “Doctor, take a look at me. When I...
Rebecca, the curvy blonde secretary, came out from the cabin of her boss. She was shaking with anger, so a colleague asked her what was wrong....
Three old men were sitting around and talking. The 80 year-old said, “The best thing that could happen to me would just to be able to...
An old couple were sitting on the porch one afternoon rocking in their rocking chairs. All the sudden the old man reaches over and slaps his...
Two Buddies were drinking in a bar one night and had became extremely drunk. One guy was so drunk that he had got sick all over...
Two buddies are fishing, but they haven’t caught anything all day. Then, another fisherman walks by with a huge load of fish. They ask him “excuse...
A man suffered a serious heart attack and had bypass surgery. He awakened to find himself in the care of nuns at a Catholic hospital. As...
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He’s rather taken a back because he can’t place...
A man traveling by train asks the ticket collector what time the train stops at Victoria. “Sir, we don’t stop at Victoria.” “But I have to...