A man was shopping in the men’s department at Bloomingdale’s when he noticed an absolutely beautiful woman behind the sales counter. He went up to her...
A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car. After looking the man over he says, “Sir, I...
Nursery school teacher says to her class, “Who can use the word ‘Definitely’ in a sentence?” First a little girl says “The sky is definitely blue”...
A man and woman were having marriage problems, and decided to end their union after a very short time together. After a most brief attempt to...
A guy is sitting at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He’s slamming tequila left and right. He grabs one, drinks it,...
A woman took her dog to the vet. She said, “I think my dog is dead”. The doctor laid the dog on the table and reached...
A blonde phoned a retail pharmacy to talk about her prescription. He said to the pharmacist, “My doctor ordered this prescription for me. Your store filled...
Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at the guy in the middle, shouting, “Your...
One fine morning Dean came early into the office and caught his subordinate, Martin kissing his secretary. Angered, Dean screamed: “Martin, do I pay you good...
A 60-year-old man went to a doctor for a check-up. The doctor told him, “You’re in terrific shape. There’s nothing wrong with you. Why, you might...
A man was watching TV and enjoying a beer. “Don’t go,” he yelled at the screen. “Do not enter that building. Walk away. Argh, you stupid...
A little boy asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, so she said yes. When he went to wipe his bum there was...
A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very...
A man went to his lawyer and said “I would like to make a will but I don’t know exactly how to go about it.” The...
A little girl is sitting on her grandpa’s lap and studying the wrinkles on his old face. She gets up the nerve to rub her fingers...
Mary and Jane are old friends. They have both been married to their husbands for a long time; Mary is upset because she thinks her husband...
A man and his wife have gone to bed. After laying in bed for a few minutes the man cuts a fart. His wife rolls over...
A man sees a gorgeous and hot woman standing alone at a bar. After tossing back a couple of shots he gets the nerve to approach...
One day a guy walks in a bar and asks for five shots of whiskey. The bartender asks why. The guy says, “I found out my...
A man and his young wife were in divorce court, but the custody of their children posed a problem. The mother leaped to her feet and...