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Three nuns died and visited St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter said he would admit them if they each answered one question. He turned...
A guy is walking down the street with his friend. He says to his friend, “I’m just a walking economy.” His friend replies, “What do you...
A couple is in bed sleeping when there’s a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. The husband rolls over and looks at the clock, and it’s half past...
A man was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie....
A woman meets a gorgeous man in a bar. They talk, they connect, they end up leaving together. They get back to his place, and as...
The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?” No one answered until...
Two guys were sitting outside a medical clinic. One of them was crying, tears were pouring down his face. The other guy asked, “Why are you...
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. “Hurry!” she said. “Stand in the corner.” She quickly...
An old man and his wife went to the doctor’s office and the doctor asked the man for a blood, urine, and feces sample. The old...
A patient was waiting nervously in the examination room of a famous specialist. “So who did you see before coming to me?” asked the doctor. “My...
A teacher asks the kids in her 5th grade class: ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ Little Larry says: ‘I wanna start...
There are three girls at a bar, a red head, a brunette, and a blonde. They have a seat at the bar. The bar tender says,...
An older couple wakes up in the morning and the husband looks over at his wife and says, “Wow! You wouldn’t believe the dream I had…”...
A lady goes in to take a tennis lesson, and the instructor notices she is using the wrong grip. After several failed attempts to correct her,...
A man returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this prognosis,...
A middle aged woman sought help from her doctor. “All my husband does is complain that I never want to have lovemaking with him,” she said....
A man and his wife were sitting in the living room discussing a “Living Will” “Just so you know, I never want to live in a...
A man got really drunk one night in his local pub. The barman refused to serve him any more alcohol and told him he should be...
A lady is having a bad day at the roulette tables in ‘Vegas. She’s down to her last $50. Exasperated, she exclaims, “What rotten luck! What...
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Wairarapa. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the...