An old man and his wife went to the doctor’s office and the doctor asked the man for a blood, urine, and feces sample. The old...
A patient was waiting nervously in the examination room of a famous specialist. “So who did you see before coming to me?” asked the doctor. “My...
A teacher asks the kids in her 5th grade class: ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ Little Larry says: ‘I wanna start...
There are three girls at a bar, a red head, a brunette, and a blonde. They have a seat at the bar. The bar tender says,...
An older couple wakes up in the morning and the husband looks over at his wife and says, “Wow! You wouldn’t believe the dream I had…”...
A lady goes in to take a tennis lesson, and the instructor notices she is using the wrong grip. After several failed attempts to correct her,...
A man returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this prognosis,...
A middle aged woman sought help from her doctor. “All my husband does is complain that I never want to have lovemaking with him,” she said....
A man and his wife were sitting in the living room discussing a “Living Will” “Just so you know, I never want to live in a...
A man got really drunk one night in his local pub. The barman refused to serve him any more alcohol and told him he should be...
A lady is having a bad day at the roulette tables in ‘Vegas. She’s down to her last $50. Exasperated, she exclaims, “What rotten luck! What...
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Wairarapa. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the...
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat....
A boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn’t getting any respect. Later that morning he went to a local sign...
A woman was found guilty in traffic court and when asked for her occupation she said she was a schoolteacher. The judge rose from the bench....
Hung Chow calls into work and says, “Hey, boss I no come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomachache and my legs-hurt, I no...
An old married couple was at home watching TV. The husband had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the...
A man goes to the doctor complaining about stomach problems, and he asks him what he’s been eating. “I only eat pool balls,” he says. “Red...
A woman goes to the local psychic in hopes of contacting her dearly departed grandmother. The psychic’s eyelids begin fluttering, her voice begins warbling, her hands...
A man was telling his neighbor, “I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s...