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A man and his wife are discussing what they think their son will be when he grows up. “I have an idea,” says the father. He...
Dan married a woman with an identical twin. Less than a year later, he was in court filing for a divorce. “Tell the court why you...
A salesman rings the door bell and Little Johnny answers. Salesman: “Can I see your dad?” Johnny: “No, he’s in the shower.” Salesman: “What about your...
A woman asked an Army General when the last time he had made love to a woman. The general replied “1956, ma’am.” The woman, in disbelief...
On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The...
An older gentleman was on the operating table a waiting surgery, and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was...
A man goes to the doctor and complains that his wife cant hear him. How bad is it? the doctor asks. I have no idea, the...
The old man placed an order for one hamburger, French fries and a drink. He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing...
A woman walks into the City Centralist office, trailed by 15 kids .. “WOW,” the social worker exclaims, “Are they ALL yours?” “Yeah, they are all...
An elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant, and resumed their trip. When leaving, the elderly...
A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said...
A hunter spots a grizzly bear 1,000 yards away, but due to some thick bushes he can’t get any closer, so he aims his rifle and...
A young lady came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, “Jeff proposed to me an hour ago.” “Then why are you so...
A class of 3rd graders return from their field trip to the farm and the teacher asks them, “What kind of noises did you hear at...
The teacher asked all the students to write an essay on the subject My Pet. The next day she started checking the homework of everyone. After...
A young couple got married and went away on their honeymoon. After two weeks they came back and finally put away all of the presents they...
While doing a vasectomy, the doctor slipped and cut off one of the man’s balls. To avoid a huge malpractice suit, he decided to replace the...
Grandpa was showing little Johnny around the farm, and when they come to the corral, he explained, “That’s a bull and a cow, and he’s serving...
The lawyer says to his client, Bill Shorten, “I have some good news and some bad news.” Bill replies: “I’ve had a bloody awful week, so...
A bus driver was plying his regular driving route when an old lady got on the bus and sat behind the driver, For every ten minutes...