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Come out of the stall with wet hands. Pour water in a constant stream on the floor and say, ‘Darn, I almost made it!’ Wash you...
If they say they’re John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask...
A customer in a restuarant orders a bowl of soup. However, the customer notices that something is wrong. So he calls the waiter over. “Can you...
Two men leave a store. One man walks to his Corvette, the other walks out to his moped. The guy with the moped admires the Corvette...
Three men, an Scot, and an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building. The...
A police officer asks a thief, “Why did you steal this stranger’s watch?” The thief replies, “I didn’t steal it — he gave it to me!”...
3 men are playing golf at a Country Club: Obi Wan Kenobi, Darth Maul and a very old man. Obi Wan tees off and hits his...
By the time a Marine pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. “You’ve got to have a room somewhere,” he pleaded. “Or just...
A man lives in a highrise on the 15th floor. Every morning, on the way to work, he takes the elevator all the way down to...
A husband and wife have four sons. The oldest three are tall with red hair and light skin while the youngest son is short with black...
A guy was limping, so his friend asked him what was wrong. He replied, “My foot bugs me sometimes. It’s just an old basketball injury.” His...
A man walks into a bar and sees his friend sitting beside a 12-inch pianist. He says to his friend, “That’s amazing. How did you get...
Johnny comes back from school crying and says, “Mommy, all the kids in the school say I have a big head.” His mother replies, “No, you...
Two men were talking about a friend who had recently passed away. “By the time Jack died, he had a transplanted heart, a plastic hip joint,...
A mother sees her son watching television and says, “Jimmy! I thought I told you to do the dishes after you do your homework! Why are...
A diner yelled out, “Waiter! What’s this fly doing in my soup?” After taking a close look at the soup, the waiter said, “It looks like...
A reverend awoke one morning to find a dead donkey in his front yard. He had no idea how it got there, but he knew he...
A little girl and her mother are at church when the little girl starts to feel sick. Her mother tells her to go throw up in...
A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the young rooster rushes and bang all 150 of...
A blind man enters a bar and find his way to a bar stool. After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind...